Saturday, June 7, 2008

CSSP Camp '08

during the past five days, i was a camp facilitator at the CSSP Challenge Camp '08. My group, C-4, wasn't the best-behaved group ever, they lacked alot of discipline and they don't take things seriously. but they were my group, and to me, they're like the best group ever, even though they may seem like nothing much. Unlike the other faci's, i didn't join my team in their discussions and activities as i didn't want to spoon-feed them and lead them to the solutions, i wanted them to get there themselves. and they did, with a little pushing from both me and my co-faciliator celestyn (her name sounds very similar to mine, alot of mix ups). There's these two guys, Ricky and Eddy (Eddy is the one with the foot on me in the photo, wearing white/light blue, and Ricky is the one wearing blue next to him). they were basically the spirit and motivation of the group, and they really showed leadership qualities, i really do think they'll achieve something big one day.first day for facis was Day Zero, monday. students only had to come on tuesday onwards. Before the camp, each faci was given a station to be in charge of, and on day zero, everyone had to set up their stations and give the other faci's a try. My station was the Mass-Triage station, and beatrix was my co-incharge. The photo up there is of the station BlindMice, where 5 people had to guide the rest of the blindfolded leaders through a maze of chairs without kicking any cups that were on the ground.during the wargames section(basically, it was captain's ball), alot of students got hurt. it was the most violent captain's ball you'll ever see. sprained arms, sprained ankles, chest pains, elbow-to-the-face. One girl even had what we suspected was a heart-attack, and there was an ambulance on-scene
Main event of the camp was the SMRT detrainment excercise, where we have to get off the train in a simulated terrorist attack, and walk on the rails til the evacuation point. Every two groups were given on cabin, so it was rather spacious. SMRT planted suspiscious people, even us faciliatating the camp didn't know about them, and we seriously got freaked out when suspicious person after suspicious person turned up, and Ambrose even gave his nervous/thinking super-stone look when one of them approached us. we were supposed to report them, but my team didn't, they just took alot of photos of the suspicious people.

I was one of the faci's chosen to simulate an arm injury, the campers weren't supposed to know i was fake. so i made a big plan, and purposely fell down in front of the campers i acted as though i broke my arm and it hurt really bad. i think i acted a little too well, cos after that the civil defence took over and they thought i really broken my arm, and even called the ambulance. I was like "erm. i'm fake, let the students take over", and the other fake injury facis, kog and steph, heard me say it too. they knew kog and steph was fake, but they seriously thought i really was injured. The media came and even the ministers came and looked at me. I was in seriously deep shit luh, and all ck did was come over, looked at us faked injured and supposedly real injured being seperated, and he LAUGHED. i seriously freaked out when the ambulance came and they took down my name and IC luh.

Last day of camp was yesterday. teary goodbyes and farewells, see-you-soons. I 'accidentally' cried when saying goodbye to the last of my campers to leave, i was seriously proud of them, they did everything by themselves. photo-taking with other facis, post photos up later. The guy down there is kog, and both of us are the camp's 'himbo's. the photos down there shows us discussing what pose to do for our himbotic photo, the last one's the actual.

I miss the camp already.





Friday, June 6, 2008

i'm back from camp, finally

lotsa stories to tell, updates tomorrow cos i'm damn bloody tired.
tomorrow's my only rest day before the run on sunday.

nights

Sunday, June 1, 2008

JUNE.

it's finally june (happy june, steph)
no longer the merry month of May.
tomorrow i'm going for the cssp camp, 5d4n.
this coming sunday i'm going for the saucony/100plus run
the week after i'm going back the children's society on monday and tuesday.
that week's thursday and friday is the diploma camp
2 weeks til the school reopens
22 more days to my birthday
22 more days and its another month with steph

this is gonna be a really happy june :)

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

a series of unfortunate events.

i hate this month of may.
seriously.

first, my laptop system goes down. then, after fixing it, the screen cracks. then the https and fps ports for internet usage disconnected. i just got it fixed today. my external hard-disk gets a loose connector. my girlfriend's blog gets flamed. i think i fractured the same spot in my arm again. my slippers spoilt. i literally lost money, around 35 bucks, 15 to a cab uncle who cheated my money, then the rest, either people have been picking notes out from my wallet, or i'm really that careless. got two offence slips from school, one where i'm not even in the wrong. missed a test today because the internet was getting fixed. missed my favourite module today because of the same reason. found out i'm getting kicked out of cypher sub-committee cos i cant make it for the leadership training camp, which in turn is caused by CSSP. PP got rejected first time round, approved after rework but advisor said i've gotta do a survey about CSSP. then found out i'm not allowed to do survey cos it's "for personal gain".

oh well. June's gonna be a BIG improvement. I hope.




Sunday, May 25, 2008

one week to go.


one week to the cssp camp thingie. and i am not done packing. asked mori whether i could do up a survery for the camp participants, and she said she'll have to ask the cssp people. I hope i'm allowed to, the fate of my PP rests upon this survey and the cssp people.

100% of you guys voted in the poll for me to change the theme of my blog. what theme should i change it to then? i'm open up to suggestions, since i'm planning to start from scratch. but i wont change my hair according to the poll. whether you like it or not.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

substance

A) people who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

B) tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. these people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by.continue this game by sending it to other people.


#1 if your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
~ erm. if i'm betrayed, then too bad luh, what can i do.

#2 if you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
~ that dream with the pink audi would be nice

#3 what will your dream wedding be like?
~ nice chapel, not too many people. reception in a garden of some sorts. and a casual theme

#4 are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
~ nope, i'm pretty sure i know what's gonna happen when it does

#5 what's your ideal lover like?
~ no ideals, lol

#6 which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
~being loved by someone you love (i'll have to agree with steph on this one)

#7 How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
~ if i reallyreallyreally DO love a person THAT much, then i'll wait

#8 if the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
~ well, lucky for me, she's sorta attached to me :3

#9 is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
~erm. i'd guess this month i'm not really lucky and all that.

apparently it's missing a #10

#11 is being tagged fun?
~ i guess so

#12 how do you see yourself in ten years time?
~ by looking at a mirror i'm standing in front of

#13 who are currently the most important people to you?
~ family, friends, steph, rukia

#14 what kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
~ steph's a nice person and a total sweetheart, lol (but she can be reallyreally evil at times)

#15 would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?~ single and rich. reallyreally filthy rich. unless married but poor but not very poor, maybe an above average kinda way poor so that it's actually considered quite well to do family

#16 what's the first thing you do every morning?
~ wake up.

#17 would you give all in a relationship?
~ define 'all'

#18 if you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
~ that one.

#19 what type of friends do you like?
~ real friends, not those fake ones that pretend to be your friend then gossip and backstab you

#20 what type of friends do you dislike?
~ fake friends, not those real ones that actually listen to you when you've got something to say, and never ever lets you down

Tagged by : steph, my termite

Here are the 8 lucky people:
-Rukia (i dunno whether you got a blog or not, but do for fun)
-Xiurong (if you manage to read my blog in time)
-Amoeba hydroxide (yes, you. i'm sure you got a blog somewhere, you just don't wanna tell me)
-NobodyHome (if you're reading this)
-Yukiko (if you remember to read this)
-Ayie (because i want to kentut also)
-Abu (cos you're emo, and your blog like never update)
-SebasKheh (cos you're sebas also)

updates

someone has been using my name on my tagboard and doing stupid stuff. if i find out who, he/she's gonna get it from me, unless it's my BFF or it's steph.

steph says my blog needs more substance. define substance, lol.

my life's not very interesting, the interesting parts are either too minute to mention, or they're it's because i'm with steph, lol.

i wanna go to chalet/camp/backpacking/rollerblading/ton at someone's place. lol
and the ads appearing on my blog are seriously clashing with my color scheme.

Monday, May 19, 2008

VesakDay

Firstly, Happy 18th Birthday to Yanni~!!!

today's Vesak day. Me being a free thinker and all, i don't celebrate this day. what i did was clean up the house (as usual), then went to beach road market to get camp supplies. I realised i have no idea how to get there by public transport, so i went there in my dad's car.

Went there, walked a few rounds, and bought Ah Po Grass Jelly and came back. i was supposed to buy many stuff from there luh, like a sharp whistle that's at least 10 times louder than normal ones, and a dynamo torch so i won't have to keep buying batteries. In the end i only bought 4 pairs of sport shorts, a pair of aqua shoes and two notebooks.

i found a treasure trove of bags at home today. there's an old school leather bag, there's an army bag from don't know where, and theres a maybank/samsonite pouch which is adequately-sized to be a ready bag, so i'm using that.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

issues.

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO GOOD OLD-FASHIONED MANNERS?

seems like almost everyone nowadays take everything for granted.

some people shout me for asking permission. some people take my things without asking me. whatever happened to good manners and mutual respect? is it lost in our society?

remind me again why we're supposed to be better than "third-world" countries, where people live in harmony with one another.

miss you, termite
I just saw the packing list for the CSSP camp.

first thing that came into my mind was OH HOLY MOTHER OF GOD (i'm allowed, i'm free thinker, remember?)

it's as follows:
  • T-Shirts (at least one dark coloured) X 03
  • Shorts / Bermudas / Track Pants X 05
  • Jacket / Windbreaker (Optional)
  • Bath Towel X 01
  • Face Towel (Optional)
  • Undergarments (As needed)
  • Socks (As needed)
  • Slippers/ Sandals X 01
  • Sport Shoes (wear it to camp) X 01
  • Toiletries (As needed)
  • Personal Medication (As needed)
  • 1-Litre Water bottle (to be filled) X 01
  • Torchlight (with spare batteries) X 01
  • Insect Repellent (Optional)
  • Note Book + Writing Materials Compulsory
  • Sleeping bag/ Ground sheet X 01
  • Rag Compulsory
  • Own Snacks for supper on Day 0 (As needed)

Besides the above, we need to bring a "Ready-Bag", it being a community safety thingy and all, so we have to pack these also:

  • SCDF Emergency Handbook (Printable versions at the website in English, Malay, Chinese and Tamil)
  • Medical Card (Printable version, just fold into quarters.)
  • Torchlight and/or candles with matches
  • Transistor radio (include additional batteries) for tuning in to national emergency broadcasts
  • Spare batteries in vacuum pack
  • Whistle
  • Essential personal medication
  • First-aid kit
  • Copies of important documents in a water-proof folder (identity card and passport)
  • Child care supplies and/or other special care items
  • Water purifiers and/or Water purification tablets
  • List of emergency telephone numbers (e.g. the Police and SCDF hotlines, telephone number for the Neighbourhood Police Centre nearest to you, and utility companies)
  • List of personal contacts (including office/school telephone numbers of family members)
  • Cash (consider in small denomination)
  • Bottled water (observe expiry date; it should be replaced periodically)
  • Biscuits and/or other dry foodstuffs (observe expiry date; the food should be replaced periodically)
  • Writing material (paper and pen/pencil)
  • One set of spare clothes (e.g. track pants and a T-shirt)

This is gonna be a killer. And i haven't even start checking whether i have anything, and it's in around two weeks.

as Jason will put it, I'm doomed.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

tskkk

scariness.

there was cssp meeting again today, found out our groupings. I'm in the coyote alliance led by farah, and i'm team 4, together with shenjie and another girl whose name sounds alot like mine when the exco slurred it out.

and i also found out that the mori and ck that visited my blog are the real deal. and that another exco told them about my blog, but they refuse to tell me who. i suspect its hanying.

overpaid a taxi uncle by FIFTEEN BUCKS yesterday. my brother's fault. the money he got down for me was bunched up, it was 25 bucks. i thought it was 10 bucks and so did the uncle, so he gave me $5.60 change for a $4.40 fare. but THERE WAS ANOTHER $15!! but too bad, called up comfort and they tracked him down, he declined having over-charged me. well, karma works in funny ways, he's gonna get retribution for eating a poor dude's money

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

my bestest best friend.

this is rukia. she's my BFF (stands for Best Friends Forever). she really is the bestest friend anyone can find. and she is a bleach addict (indicated by her chosen name). she sneezes funny, like hyuk-knnngh. We talk about totally random stuff, always. in fact, now i'm randoming with her, and we're drifting towards yesterday's post. lol.

on another note, HOW DID MORI AND CK FIND MY BLOG?? OMGZOMGZOMGZ. next time give warning first cannnn. lol.
but actually also nothing to hide, hahahaha

today went to schl, badminton-ed with kevin. apparently i'm starting to suck at it. or maybe because i seriously can't get used to kevin's younger bro's racquet. after that, went to cypher room, kelly brought her dog, name's mickey. mickey licked ram all over the face, it was almost obscene.

after school went to meet steph, slacked the library. She studied while i comic-ed. and then she had to go guitar, so sent her home. so there.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

clarifications-declarations

i'm writing this post because there's alot of questions that alot of people want to ask me, namely,

WHO IS STEPHANIE. WHO IS TERMITE.

well, let me tell you, stephanie yeo xin ying, or termite, as i sorta labelled her, is my girlfriend.

she's the one in the photo here. not the two boys who lives in some rural village in china.

believe it or not, i'm real lucky to have her.

she's from jurong jc, and she's bloody smart for her age (her age being one year younger than me). and she takes german as a third language.


steph, love you <3




Sunday, May 11, 2008

i hate you, iron man~!

as you all have noticed, i've removed the iron-man banner and put back my own title banner. why, you'd ask. Number one: cos iron-man ain't that hot no more. Number two: I'M DAMN DISAPPOINTED IN THE MOVIE.

uh huh, watched it online already, it sucked. went out with steph today, first for the cssp thing, then after that we just slacked around, walked from kallang to singapore flyer to esplanade. what can i say, i seriously have alot of free time.

tomorrow's mother's day; i haven't got anything for her yet. oh no.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

updates.

this is shafiq. he is gay. he likes to wear baoyan's cardigan for fun. okay, actually he's not gay, but he looks gay in the cardigan. so what if i made him wear it. lol
this is akina. she is a guy. but i said she's a 'she'. that makes her not a guy. but she likes to pose infront of the urinal and pretend she's peeing standing up.
this is the mascot for the School of Engineering in RP. apparently they worship me, as you can clearly see that it's SEB on top. what can i say, they like me. but not as much as someone does.


this is a veryveryvery old song, but it's bloody nice and nostalgic. it's White Town's Your Woman. take a listen

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

lost and found.

went through my computer's manymany drives today, and found alot of random stuff, such as steph's baby photos, the song rukia sent, nicholas's funny photos, tshirt designs, powerpoint slides, weird graphics.

rukia wants me to blog about what a nice friend she is. rukia is a very nice friend, she's gonna get me a nice big souvenier from indonesia. and she's a nice person to talk to also.

shafiq doing a wiki page for me. let's see how long before it gets deleted. [edit/ shafiq lied.]

Sunday, May 4, 2008

hoe mah gawd

The Sunday Times, May 4, 2008

Seal tries to mate with penguin

London- An Antarctic fur seal has been filmed trying to have sex with a king penguin on a beach on Marion Island, a sub-Antarctic island that is home to both species.
two scientists, who witnesses the incident and captured it on camera, said they believed it was the behavious of a frustrated, sexually inexperienced young male seal.

*skip to last paragraph*

This is thought to be the first recorded example of a mammal trying to have sex with a member of another class of vertebrate, such as bird, fish, reptile or amphibian, the BBC said.


WHATS HAS OUR WORLD IS BECOMING?? *cue bimbotic voice*

i seriously wonder how a peng-eal/sea-guin will look like.

talking about looks, how would you imagine a singaporean superhero to be like? ideas/comments on tag, if you'd like. Try to imagine a parking-ticket auntie that can fly.

kanchiong-spider-man, if you'd like. or blind-as-a-batman.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

steph's coming home tonight

uh huh, her flight's leaving china at eight, and she's reaching at forty past midnight. so actually its not tonight. but i'm sleeping then, so its tonight for me. i actually thought she was coming back yesterday tho. lol. 8 days is bloody long for a china trip, and what's worse, a learning trip. oh well.



jumpstyle. it's what i'm working on learning. it might look easy in the video, but trust me, it's bloody hard. two days of working on it and i've still not gotten the basics. no fret though, i WILL master it.

visited my dad in the hospital today. played with the blood pressure thingy they have beside every bed, and i kept pumping air into it. pump. pump. pump. pump. POP! lol. not my fault, didn't do anything. luckily my dad discharged after that, he won't be using it.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

blades of stainless steel.

iron man came out in cinemas today. official website says may 2nd, but it opens in singapore today, april 30th. So anyways, the movie came out today, and guess what i did..

nope, didn't watch the movie. went iceskating instead, with wanrong, jessica and lindsey.

"lindsey, wanrong & jessica"

wanrong wore the tshirt that we painted for her, then everyone was wearing black, 'cept for lindsey, who wore white. amazingly no one felt cold at the ice skating rink today. maybe they didn't really turn down the temperature. which was why the ice was melting so much today.


i swear that, near the end of our ice skating session, it felt more and more as though it rained, and we were roller-blading on wet pavements. THERE WERE PUDDLES, and when we skated past, THERE WERE RIPPLES. THAT MUCH MELTED ICE. which was why lindsey fell, i dunno, three times? and i fell once. jess and wanrong didn't fall, another amazing feat.

oh yar, there was this ultra-jihong uncle that would aim the three girls, and purposely zoom past them. damn funny. when he went past me i purposely went WHOAH in a way that it was audible to everyone present there, just to make him look bad. i don't care if i look retarded, haha.

cos i always do.you're coming back, aren't you?

Monday, April 28, 2008

Wanrong turns 18~!!

Today was rong's 18th birthday. told her yesterday that i wasn't going to school, so that i could sorta surprise her, but according to her she expected it. maybe we're too predictable.

so anyways during the second break, jess, lindsey and i left class, then we headed down to causeway point to decide on a cake to get her. ended up with swenson's berry-something ice-cream cake, cos they said wanrong like berries, and ice-cream cake is nice.

the swenson's people told us the ice-cream cake could only last an hour without refrigeration, so i tried to get the cafe galilee people to lend us their fridge. then after that i found out from the brochure that it can last 6 hours with no problem.

so we got the cake, and went up to her class and lighted up her candles, then sang happy birthday as we entered the class. she was doing her RJ, like so:but in the end she could make nothing out of the RJ writing attempt, so we headed down to hell foodcourt cos swenson didn't give knives for their cakes.

after the cake eating and stuff, wanrong got me to write her RJ for her. seems like she didn't change abit from the time that we were in the same class, still looking for people to help her do her RJ. some people just dont change.

"multi-eyed me"

How's china, termite


The Kelsey Briggs Story.



Kelsey Briggs. The little angel whose purpose is to protect other children.

stop child abuse.

read her story here

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Iron Man! Iron Man!

Does whatever an iron can!

Can he press all your clothes?

Hot steam shoots from his nose!

Hoo boy! There goes the Iron Man.


Teflon Coat? That's for sure!

Safe for silk, wool and more!

Wrinkles gone with one pass,

Electric cord retracts up his ass!

Hoo boy! There goes the Iron Man.


In the still of night,

When the butler deserts,

Like a steamin' demon,

He will press all your shirts!


Iron Man, Iron Man

Kind to delicates Iron Man

Wealth and fame he's ignored,

Just provide, Ironing board.

That suit, it looks a little banged up,

Before that suit you hang up,

Give it to Iron Man!!!!


sang to the tune of the Spider-man Theme Song

I GOT A NEW PHONE~!

after that unfortunate incident of me losing my LG phone the other time, i've been using my old pink sony ericsson, as you all noticed.

i'm using that NO MORE.
Let's give a warm welcome to my new phone that cost me nothing, Sony Ericsson's Z770i~!

*cue applause*
no more playing chapteh with my phone, this one's a keeper ^^
4 more days

Saturday, April 26, 2008

i'm prepared

took the "Community Emergency Preparedness Programme" today, all five modules of it. and then realised that i've taken every single module before. everything was the same, 'cept for the part about CPR. apparently the version me and CK knows is outdated, and we were taught the "new and improved" version by the civil defence people.


during the first aid module, everyone was playing with the bandages; the CD people gave them out like as though they cost nothing, so i bagged three. The rest took alot, and we managed to mummify ambrose, like so:
then we proceeded on to take photos with them. i didn't cos i was holding the camera.

after taking photos, we realised that we don't know whether he was smiling, so we proceeded on to draw him a smile on the bandages:

he looks like some twisted version of the cyclops. but we're proud of him, he's our creation.

i didn't manage to escape myself from being bandaged either, this is what i did:

yea, it was a whole lot of fun today. OH, steph, you're right, there IS something fishy going on between those two, i confirmed it today with my half-of-a-sixth sense. lol.

I MISS YOU.




"cheeky CK"

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

a reflection.

YEAH PEOPLE, I'M BACK~!!


laptop crashed on friday, back today. acer's got great service, get acer laptops.


this past week has been a pychological/emotional roller-coaster ride for me. been thinking alot. as in ALOT. plus the high fever on sunday and abit of monday, plus skipping classes on monday and tuesday, gave me lots of time to think.


i've changed alot, ever since i came into poly. i got to know alot of great people, and also some not-so-great ones, but i'm not talking about that kinda change. i'm talking about what's inside, the deep, psychological stuff. when i had the high fever, i slept more than half the day away, and the whole time i dreamt i was in a coliseum fighting goat after goat. up to this point, you all might think there's no link, but the thing is, i had the exact same dream when i was younger, but instead of fighting them, i was running away.


i've grown since then. not only physically, but mentally also. those of you who knew me last time, would know of me and some new species of monkey that would not stop jumping around. i do that less now, except when i'm allowed to. this is sorta me being matured i guess. no more jumping around. no more poking fun of others without caring for their feelings. no more excessive violence. no more the old me, i guess. which is good.


SHE HELD MY HAND LAST NIGHT.


Tuesday, April 15, 2008

God. Religion.

today i was at the kopitiam opposite school in the morning as usual, when i heard an indian man talking to his counterpart about God(s) and the different religions, and i have to say that what he said actually sounds logical to me. So for today's post i'm gonna write about MY OWN views on the topic.

up til this point i have no choice but to stick in a disclaimer, as all of you know that topics that relate to religions are all very sensitive and touchy-feely. If you feel that you are easily offended by such stuff, then i urge you to wait for my next posting.

i think everyone's still reading, but oh well, i tried. most of you are still reading because you're curious about what's coming up, either that are you're just getting ready to shoot me down with my own words. If the latter, then let me emphasise: "MY OWN POINT OF VIEW; MY OPINION, BASED ON MY SENSE OF LOGIC". If you've got any opinions that are about what's going to be shown below, then please put them in the comments section, and don't flood my tagboard with all your displeasure

God. the omnipotent. The all-being. The creator. is he really there? or is he just a figment of mankind's imagination? Has anyone actually seeen him? Has he shown himself and displayed his awesome prowess? i don't think so. Why do we thank him when good things happen, and curse in his name when the opposite occurs? This, to me, doesn't make sense.

When we pray to God for help, it is only because we ourselves have no one else to turn to, so it's comforting to know that there's always some god-like entity watching over you, helping you when the need arises. After your prayers, you naturally feel better, so you will tend to work things out in a more cheerful disposition that you were in before. This is more psychological then godlike-phenomenal, because when you see things in the brighter side of life, everything would obviously seem clearer than when you sulk and stare at people with your morbid little eyes. When things eventually do work out, you thank God, the head-honcho, knowing he's always looking out for his children, and putting your faith in Him, but not on yourself, even when you aren't really sure whether he exists or not.

Humankind is young. and young people tend to do immature things, cos they cant really think well. we tend to follow the rule "seeing is believing", so what happens when we are expected to put our faith in something that we can't even see? we imagine how He would look like. We draw him either as the end of a torchlight that's shining in your eyes, or as an old man with a long, flowing beard of white. this is just to make us feel better, to cover our eyes, telling us that we know what we're putting out faith in.

For those who still can't believe that one old man is in control of their fates, they split up this omnipotent being into many not-so-potent beings, each one with a specific task in hand, so that these people know exactly who to look for when they are looking for blessings in their paths, knowing that this one entity has skill specially made for helping me in this area, he/she/it could never fail me. And all this trouble just to put one at ease.

After all this gibberish that most of you might ignore, my main point is: have faith in yourself, don't put faith in others, cos only you know exactly what you can or cannot do, and this thing called faiths helps you with an extra 'ooomph'. And the other thing is, try being optimistic, don't left anyone or anything spoil your day. When people around you see that you're cheerful, they will start feeling better too, and in turn, when you see the smiles starting to appear on their faces, you'll also feel better.

Thank you.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

updates.

i woke up at 3:45 pm today.
i swear i've never slept so much in my life, and i feel bloody lethargic right now. i'm blogging because i feel a need to, it's been gnawing at the side of my head for the past few days, but i've been to busy to even start typing a paragraph, sorry about that.

yesterday was the CYPHER beach outing. venue was Sentosa. we were supposed to meet at harbourfront at 0930, but more than half of the people were late, and most of them were leaders. the group that were on time went into sentosa first, while the rest met up with us later on.

when we reached sentosa we played a little frisbee, then after that it started to rain. everyone ran to the pavillion while sean and i went to one of the bars and had a draft each. the rain lasted for quite some time, and it was reallyreally cold, and i should've brought a sweater with me. but come to think of it, who brings sweaters to Sentosa? something's wrong with the person if he/she does, either that or the person's really sensitive to the cold.

after the rain died down a little i went to the pavillion to find the rest. turns out they played tug-of-war, and they split a length of rope into two. after that they played some more tug-of-war, and split half of the original length into two again. after that we ran away, cos it wasn't our rope.

fast forward to the interesting stuff. we pulled everyone into the water. then neo had the same idea he has everytime he goes to a beach, "Let's dig a FUCKING big hole" (exact words he said last year). so we did, and took photos inside, which i hope to receive. then after that a few of us got buried inside up to our neck levels. and we were sitting upright.

after we were almost done with burying, the tide started to come in REALLY FAST. the water rushed into where we were buried, so i just quickly wriggled my way out, and the rest did the same. except for akina, cos she was stuck really deep in the sand. i swear it was the scariest thing in my life. the water rose up til her chin while we were trying to pull her out, but luckily we did in the end, cos i don't want another dead friend.

after everything has cooled down, a whole bunch of them went to cafe del mar's foam party. without telling me. so i stayed back and entertain a group of year ones. when the bunch came back we played "The King Game". we played that last year also. we did things that we do not want to be reminded about, so i'm not putting details.

and jieying, it was gaydrian's idea, don't slaughter me. gaydrian, serves you right. emily, thanks for finding my slippers, owe you one.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Message from Melanie

Dear Sebastian, Zaki, Moses, Nicholas, Ephraim, Shamala, Wenshan, Marli, Farhana and Nelly,

Hello, I only just got round to opening up wedding presents last weekend and I must say that I really liked your presents. And it was lovely to see you at the wedding!

The cute “couple” bottles are now displayed on the living room bookshelf next to a toy robot, to be consumed on special occasions.

And I love sparkly anything wine, so thanks girls for that pink bubbly.

Hope you guys are enjoying 2nd year and your new classes so far!

Just to clarify on the “ravenous” remark the pastor made: my church friends who are sec school teachers had told her that in general, that students eat a lot (as they did for their respective weddings) but it is not fair to have given you guys this generalization as you are mature, sophisticated poly students. Sorry for that, didn’t expect this to come out! However, I hope you enjoyed the cupcakes!

(Please forward this to whoever in this mail you think would not read their school e-mails, thanks!)

Luff,

melanie lee academic staff
centre for culture & communication
t: 3100 1348 f: 6415 1310

today is not monday

okay, i didn't blog yesterday because i had a splitting headache. why? you'll find out later.

monday

yesterday was the first day of school. chance said to meet at the usual kopitiam at 0700, but i told him that first train comes at around 0615 for me, so i told him i'll try my best. i woke up bloody early just to walk to bukit batok mrt so i'll make it. what happened? they came at 0730. i reached at 0645.

walked to school later on, we didn't want to be late. but as fate had it, RP had power failure, and although the escalator going up to blocks W6 & E6 worked, they're elevators didn't. since my class was W65L, i had to climb 5 storeys, and the first three was in total darkness cos the contractor didn't have brains to put windows in the stairwells. reached my class after the morning excercise, and it didn't have the usual penguin enclosure coldness. i perspired like a wet dog, because the contractor was also dumb enough to make the windows permanantly closed.

half the class came late that day, because of the fool who jumped onto the mrt track at choa chu kang/yew tee. we practically didn't do anything for the first meeting. i have a good feeling about this class, they are seriously quite enthusiastic, and not over the top. We had to make a turtle write out "HELLO WORLD" for the class, and i did what i was supposed to. programmed it on a platform called python, never heard of it.

after school, hung out with akina, chance, sean and chance-brother-called-ben's girlfriend. played all the camp games luh, and sean just sucks at them, dont know why. then played the friendster story game, then after that played chinese games translated to english. after that chance and i took a cab to causeway, when i got out i almost hit a pole.

funny thing is, after i reached clementi, i jaywalked and walked into a no jaywalking sign. that's where the splitting headache came from. doctor said i had a minor concussion, possibility of internal bleeding, but to me, internal bleeding means a bruise.



tuesday/today

went to school again. went to first meeting. the faci asked each team to draw their island, my team had a valley of death, macdonalds, giants peakers, a dragon, a man killing the dragon, a tornado, a lightning storm, a nuclear silo, people protesting, a dock that keeps burning, a weed plantation, so on and so forth. funny thing is that we called it "island of peace".

left at second meeting. went to library awhile to read some comics, saw lindsey and jessica, who skipped class today. hung out with them awhile, and then went to the job interview at clarke quay. i passed. and i'm the youngest in the group. but i look the oldest.

i misinterpreted the email. it said "not allowed: sandals/slippers & berms, tshirt, jeans allowed, wear proper footwear". i thought it meant that everything until jeans was not allowed, but it was just no sandals and slippers, berms onwards everything can.

went back to the kopitiam to hang out with the bunch minus akina and plus chance's classmates. came home. steph has 40 bucks worth of medicine to make her feel better, and i only have packets of tissue to stop my leaking nose.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

effects of fatigue

yesterday was the second day for leaders at the FOP. there were too bloody little people leftover on the second day, compared to the first day, so each team had 3 leaders, and we still had extra. i was one of the extra, a teamless bastard going around disturbing the others.


seriously this year's freshmen are not hyper/gungho/on enough, we had to help them finish their mascot cos they couldn't finish. SIT came up with some weird remote control thing and two guys that say they are gundamn but obviously are not because of the lousy craftsmanship of the costumes, if they can even be considered as costumes. only the painting was done properly, because the leaders did the painting.

RP broke a world record yesterday evening, "world's largest leapfrog event". I was part of team E4, lead by melvin. it was so bloody tiring, after the leapfrog everyone had tense leg muscles. spent the bulk of last night running away from people trying to paint my face, but in the end it still got painted.


Today was cssp training number one. jonathan's name isn't inside the list, i have no idea why. my team won the best cheer award, because i came up with the cheer, duh. we're team two, and we called ourselves 'pairs' but the exco person called us bears. steph's team was called power rangers, and that guy called them powder rangers.

thats all for now, i'm tired



Thursday, April 3, 2008

posted.

Current Mood:


They built the ship "Titanic"
To sail the ocean blue;
They thought they built a ship
That no water could go through,
But the Lord of mighty hands
Knew the ship would never land,
It was sad when the big ship went down..

*Oh, it was sad, oh, it was sad,
It was sad when the big ship went down, to the bottom;
Where the husbands and wives
And the children lost their lives,
It was sad when the big ship went down
(repeat until you're happy)



innocent camp song? i don't think so
feels rather sadistic to me.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

newsflash from the border kingdom of boredom


i had nothing better to do today. i watched the above video, and after awhile it became mesmerising. watch it if you have time to burn. the robot's name is called keepon.

zaki has came up with lyrics for a song, he's planning to call it true intentions. tune ain't out yet, but the lyrics are good. check them out:

TRUE INTENTIONS, by [9254]™

These songs don't mean a thing
Unless you feel the rhythm, the beat
That makes you want to swing
Even though you have two left feet

These words don't mean a thing
Unless you read what's in between
To find deep and hidden meaning
Seeing beyond what can be seen

These feelings don't mean a thing
Unless I tell it to you now
Lost the rhythm, the rhymes
To tell you...tell you...

Here is where the ego starts...
And this is where it ends...

This life don't mean a thing
For you made the songs to sing
The words to say, to rhyme
Making this life so sublime

My life don't mean a thing
Without the songs you sing
The words you say and rhyme
As you smile a smile sublime

Trapped in continuous blabber
All I want to say is this
Without you, my life is sadder'
And I don't want to end this...

Here is where the ego starts...
And this is where it ends...
Hence, this is where I say...

I LOVE YOU...

White Ink. by neo

If i could write in white ink i would,
but he said i was crazy
If i could take this pain and throw it all away i would,
but she still drives me crazy
If i could turn back the hands of time i would,
but he said i was crazy
If i could tear this heart apart i would,
but then they'd all say i'm crazy
If i could stop these walls from fading i would,
but she already says i'm crazy
if i could jump to someone new i would,
but then she'll get driven crazy
so these words i set in stone
damn it girl, i love you
if i could take your hand back i would,
but then i'd just know i'm crazy.



-

midnight posting

i just realised.
i've done nothing big with my life.

i want to help all the people i can, one step at a time.
but the steps i've taken are useless.

i've changed the lives of nobody.

all the talk about doing it for the better good. i'm not seeing results
and what am i doing? sulking.

it's because i'm useless, i can't do anything right. i can't even sulk properly.

other useless people only eat and sleep. i can't even sleep properly, how useless is that.
and because of the fact i sleep much less than other's i've wasted even more time.

i'm useless, and i suck. thanks for being you, sebastian.

it really helps.




dear lord,
i know i'm not christian and all, i don't even have roots in christianity
but i really need guidance now
if not from you, at least from your other "higher entity" friends
i need some reassurance
and i'm looking towards you for faith. for i have none.
please.
amen.





-

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Here Ye, Here Ye..

i've got a very happy thing to announce....

DISTURBAN & CONFUSCIOUS IS OFFICIALLY TOGETHER~!

superheroes unite~! our very first superhero couple ^^
congratulations XD

i miss termite. she ain't online.

life. by s'bas-chen

life is like a performance
life, it isn't real
in life you have to appease the people
the people who provides your meals

life is like a performance
life, where you're the actor
in life you're never who you truly are
your true self is never a factor.

life is like a performance
life is your giant stage
in life you're never allowed to be
never allowed to act your age.

life is like a performance
life, your audience's just a few
but little does the audience know
does the audience know, the real you?
i deleted yesterday's post. it defiles my blog.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

The Day After.

I went into self-induced coma three times today. Once in the morning, once in the afternoon, and once after grocery shopping. i've got no idea why this camp made me especially tired. maybe it was all the running away from reality i've been doing during the camp.

some of you might noticed, i was pretty dazed during the camp, with the blank look in my eyes. some of you saw me writing in my notebook in the middle of the night. some of you saw me bringing the notebook everywhere i went, flipping thru it when i had the time. well, to tell you the truth, i was thinking very deeply. amazing right? well, i managed to reshuffle all my thoughts, but never actually sorted them out. it's a start, though.

Looking forward to the next big activity in my schedule. back to home, back to the kingdom of boredom.

Cypher Camp '08

on monday last week i was called in to become a replacement student leader for another which couldn't make it to the camp. the camp started on thursday for the students, but started on wednesday for all the logistic, events and student leaders, not to mention the cypher committee

This camp has been one of the gay-est camps i've ever been to, full of topless masculine guys running around in public and guys touching each other. luckily i was left out from all those. don't believe me? see it for yourself:



okay, back to the topic. The number of freshmen this year was a bloody hell lot, but apparently it wasn't enough for the committee people, as they only divided them into 14 groups, instead of the planned twenty. if you want to roughly estimate the number, look at this photo below and multiply that by 4
that's a hell lot right? but anyways, because they didn't divide all 40 leaders into 20 groups as there were only 14, some/most groups had three leaders, like the one i'm in charge of, together with daiyu and azirah. this is my team:


The top photo was taken on the first day during one of the game stations. i'm the one at the back with a beanie on. you can see that they haven't really bonded at all. the one below was taken just before camp break, and you can see the big difference. that's why the team won the award for "Most Improved Team".

We went to sentosa on the second day (for the campers) and there was alot of excitement in the air. except for my team, which still hasn't bonded yet. i actually lost my temper in front of everyone at one of my campers because he showed some stupid attitude, but forget about it. It was a bloody tiring day as they had the games stations at sentosa seperated so far away from one another, and we travelled back and forth many times, until all of us had blisters on our soles. The only fun part was the luge ride, which all of us (including leaders) got a free ride, and i tell you, IT'S BLOODY FUN~! after the luge ride we got onto the skyride, which was basically the opposite of the luge. this is the view from my seat, way up there:

this guy up here is one of my campers. he had to take the ride alone cos the dumb people at the station didn't know how to let him in with me and another team member.

After the camp, everyone came back to school for Party @ Agora Hall, which was basically everyone wearing their secondary school uniforms and dancing around with pumping music while the lights are off. I wore my secondary school t-shirt with white jeans, cos i burnt the rest of my uniform already.

To reinforce the gay-ness of the camp, here's some more photos:

These are some of the leaders and committee members. Everyone up on stage are wearing skirts. but there's only 2 girls up there.

This is Azree's upskirt shot. he's the one on the extreme left in the photo on top. he was my leader from last year's cypher camp, when i was a freshman, and he's bloody wise for his age.

This is Jon. He's wearing a bra, although you can't see it in this photo. we had alot of bra-snapping fun with him around, although i have no idea who's bra he's wearing.

On the last day we had watergames, nothing much, everyone got wet by hook or by crook. after everything, we broke camp and came home.

-fin-

when i said i liked you, you said you felt the same. when i said i missed you, you said you missed me too. So why didn't you reply when i said i love you?

Saturday, March 29, 2008

I'm Back

uh huh. back from camp. but bloody tired. can i do the blogging tomorrow, please?

pretty please?



with sugar on top?

call me lazy, but when you've been through what i just had, you'd understand
i missed you, termite

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

THE HORROR

i'm going for the camp later on at twelve noon. the thing is, i'm not allowed to bring my laptop, when i thought i could. which means i can't come online every night to chat and blog.

i packed everything already, plus a couple of extra sets of clothing considering the weather sucks right now (unless you get to share an umbrella with a certain someone). One of the items that was compulsory as stated in the pack list was A CAMERA. not everyone has that you know, why is it compulsory? LOL.

Although i'm gonna be missing for quite sometime, don't worry, because since i'm bringing along a camera, i'll make sure i take lotsa interesting photos, and when i come back, i'm gonna have a blogfest.

Don't miss me okay? LOL

S.W.A.K.B.A.L.W.S


sealed with a kiss because a lick won't stick.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

s'bas-chen's creed

After all was said and done,
More words were said, than actions had come.
I hereby set my creed in stone
Should I ever forget, in cases unknown.

Word's I've written, I'll never alter,
Stay true to them, I will not falter.
Words I've ever said and spoken,
and promises, they'll never be broken.

Should friends need assistance, I'll help them achieve
The life they deserve, their lives as it's lived.
Should they have problems they cannot resolve,
I'll stay with them, 'til the question is solved.

I'll always remember, I'll never forget;
pray that never happen, for I'll always regret.

-

Monday, March 24, 2008

ouch.

My throat's better today

I've got one last day to recover before the last minute orientation camp on wed-sat. yeap, i'm going on a camp, so i might not be online that much. but i'll be bringing my laptop, so most likely there'll be posts up here. If i'm not tired enough.

The camp is RP's School of IT orientation camp for year ones, and because laobu/jace's friend suddenly dropped out, i've been asked to take over. So now i have one day to prepare for a camp that's lasting 4 days and 3 nights. And jace asked me to pack 3 days 2 nights. LOL.

Saturday is most prolly CSSP training day. But the camp ends at 5pm that day. which means i'll disappear for most of the morning. and there goes my excercise regime.

Fearless

I'm tall.
I like clowns.
I plan to own a car.
Ghosthunting is fun.
I've rode on aeroplanes.
I chased snakes for fun.
I catch spiders for sport.
I shout back at the thunder.
Illnesses come and go for me.
I was almost dead. on purpose.
I never prepare for interviews or exams.
I cross bridges everytime i come home.
I've got no problem talking to masses of people.
My favourite place at home is the inside of my cupboard.

I'm overflowing with luck.

But am I fearless?

-termite

Sunday, March 23, 2008

i realised.

i think.
i thought.
i 'thunk'.
i thank.

i think today was one of the worst days of my life. i woke up with a voice that sounded like the exhaust pipe of a low-grade motorbike, from screaming at eileen for almost half the time i saw her yesterday at the bbq, and considering the fact i drank barely a litre of water yesterday. i'm feeling so lousy now that even while i'm typing, my head is on the table. everything that got wet yesterday smelled so bad, i'm having them soaked in perfumed water as i'm typing, before i proceed to wash them a couple of times.

i thought hard about what happened to me yesterday/today. it got me feeling much worse after she said she didn't want to spoil this friendship, and i got into a serious fit. Now that i think of it, it was seriously not the way to handle things. I went down to my happy place and thought it over HARD, and took into consideration what people had said to me before. Now that i've got everything straightened out, i agree that this friendship is important, i wouldn't want it to turn sour also.

i 'thunk'-ed. because i was tired. and i'm still sick. i bet i slept half of today away. and i haven't ate anything since last night's bbq. and i also tripped and fell over my blanket around fifteen minutes ago, and now i've got a huge swollen bump on my head, and i wonder if it'll ever go down.

i thank christina. because i found enlightenment through her post yesterday. yes, i agree with her, we all know what we want deep inside, its just whether we've realised it or not. i did, i just want her to be happy (her not referring to christina, but i want her to be happy also) . ask yourselves: "what is rejection?" it is the fact of being rejected by somebody. have any of you been through this, really? i've not, and i never will.
quote christina: "wanting something and having it are two totally different things." and now i know what i want. that's my idea of a happy ending.

-

Yesterday's Blog Post

I lost my voice.

yesterday was the chingay's leader appreciation night, was held at pits 5 & 6 at pasir ris park.
Met steph up at jurong point library in the morning, then we headed down to pasir ris together.
reached pasir ris at around 1530-1600 hours, was deciding whether to wait for xiurong at the mrt station, or go down to the park first and find the pits. decided on the latter.
Halfway there it started to raid heavily, and we had to seek shelter, but the moment we found somewhere to settle down, it stopped raining, so we continued looking

i suppose that, when we finally reached pits 5 & 6, the people we saw there has just reached also, so me and steph wanted to pretend to not see anything and continue walking, but amanda recognise me and smiled/wave. so i had to smile/wave back. plan failed. But still we continued walking on to look-see around the park. We settled at one of the breakwaters, not noticing there was a tent behind us that was CLOSED TIGHT AND ROCKING. until it started to rain, then we turned around and saw it while rushing for shelter. steph refused to take out her umbrella until halfway towards the toilet.

when the rain stopped (again), we went back to the pits, and i saw KINGKONG and ALLAN~! faces that i actually recognise~!! shiyong rented a bike and allan was trying to teach him, so i asked whether i could ride it awhile, and he said yes. i took it out for a spin, but it started to rain very heavily (again), so i had to rush back to the pits. shiyong, allan, steph and i headed down towards downtown east for cover, while the rest of the people there hid in the tent that was pitched. it was 1645 hours when we settled at burger king, shiyong and allan both having a meal, me and steph both having nothing (though i regret not eating anything first).

When we went back i think it was already 1700 hours, and it was still raining, albeit not so heavy. we hid at one of the shelters near the pits, then the people from the tent started moving all their stuff there too. why? cos the tent was also flooded. then they decided that they weren't gonna give a heck about the weather, and proceeded to start a barbeque fire with umbrellas over their heads, and aremed with lighters, charcoal, fire starters and aerosol sprays. and they actually started a fire. IN THE RAIN. -insert sounds of amazement-

People started arriving when it was around 1900 hours, and by then it wasnt raining already, but everything was wet and soaking, and earthworms were strewn across the pathways. every step shiyong took was like genocide to the earthworm community. they started to barbeque the foodstuff, and the rest helped to put it on satay sticks. i barely ate anything, except for a couple of crabsticks and raw sausages. I got bored, so i dragged steph to go back to the breakwater with me, and the tent wasn't there when we went back. we sat there for i-have-no-idea-how-long, then headed back. there was SO MUCH PEOPLE ALLOFASUDDEN. i could spot faces i recognised, like XIURONGGG, and a couple of people said hi to me but i swear i don't even know them. and i heard someone call xiurong "hentai"

we went back to the barbeque pits, and then we were dragged to help with the preparation of the food again. then after that we had chit chat with the people, then ate some marshmellows, then allan suddenly asked me to was the tin containers that were used to hold the fried rice and beehoon. THEY WERE RECYCLING IT. AHHHHHHHH~ i didn't really touch anymore food for the rest of the night. then christina called me, but because my handphone sucks, i could barely hear a word she was saying. steph called her in the end, and we found out that christina wanted us to go fetch her. we were looking for ko kun to go with us, but i have no idea where he disappered to, so we ended up going to fetch her ourselves.

when we were outside, we saw christina go past us on the bus, and thought she missed her stop, so we asked her to alight at the next stop. apparently WE were the WRONG ones, cos christina alighted at a bus stop closer to the place. when we were escorting her back, christina saw people who were going home already, and she started to scream like a banshee, her signature move. it was so loud, i bet the wild boars on pulau ubin coweredn fear. at the pits, christina went everywhere to greet people, then she took a large plate of food, and actually managed to finish it with no problems. then christina, steph and i sat on the breakwater closest to the pits, and started chit chatting about stuff like how the moon is so nice, that orion the hunter was above my head, and how the moon was so nice, and christina started looking for the big dipper, then went back to saying how the moon was so nice.

then the funniest thing ever happened. Shiyong grilled two chicken chops and came over and told me, "sebas, 'specially for you", but i doubt it was really for me luh, there were TWO. then the group near us was going all, "SEBAS, NOT REALLY FOR YOU LUH" but i still ate. luckily it was me who ate first, cos the thing was RAW. RAWNESS. warm outside, COLD INSIDE. with a tinge of SOUR. that was the last thing i put in my mouth during the barbeque, and i couldn't even bear to swallow it, and i spat it out.

When it was getting late, me and steph left, and met kokun at the mrt station, then we went back. sent steph home, then managed to get a cab (it was past midnight already). the cab uncle was talkative luh, but it was the bearable kind, and the things he talked about made sense, if you filtered out the vulgarities. He talked so much he missed my turn, and we went pretty far to get back. he promised a discount, but i felt so bad so i wanted to stop at the point where the money i had in my walled was just nice for the fare. I only had seventeen bucks, and it was 17 right outside sunset way, so i asked him to stop. the thing is, he said it was okay, and offered to charge me 15 bucks only for bringing me to my doorstep. SO PAISEH LUH. so i gave him 17 bucks, cos i cant let him waste all the fuel for nothing right.. the meter said twenty bucks plus when i stopped. i feel so guilty.